It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
