addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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