I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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