Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
