you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
