sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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