Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
