What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
