Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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