There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
This house was built for laser tag.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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