I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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