Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
