i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
