I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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