Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
