just tell him i said nine months
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize