so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It's shark week go big or go home
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
