He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize