No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
this must be what syphilis tastes like
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
