I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
