I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize