dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
