Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize