Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
