you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
