Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
No subtext here. People are naked.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
