if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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