I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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