Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
