this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
