ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
