with your own penis?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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