I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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