What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Mom said you looked used
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
