How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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