IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
