So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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