How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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