YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Panties = found
Randomize
