do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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