im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
