He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
