I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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