Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
