people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Randomize
