Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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