next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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