Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
