it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
