Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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